I get way too many marketing emails. I do try to unsubscribe from some, but for the most part I’m actually interesting in what they’re selling, I’m too lazy to click “unsubscribe” (is that the epitome of laziness? complaining because you get too many emails, but not taking any action to stop it? woe is me), or I just don’t want to forget about a particular store or item I need to buy in the future. Bed, Bath, and Beyond emails are equal parts laziness and don’t want to forget.
As anybody who has moved within the past 5 years can tell you, they hound you with 20% off coupons, which is pretty fantastic. My coworker informed me that the very best thing to buy with your 20% off coupon (it’s only for 1 item) is a Roomba. I couldn’t disagree. A robot vacuum would be pretty fucking cool and it’s one of the most expensive single items in the store. We opted for a more moderately priced vacuum with the first 20%. Then the coupons just kept coming. There was no need to be judicious. Use it for that $5 garlic press. Who cares? There will be another in a week! Woohoo!
Needless to say, I keep the emails, so that if I ever need anything for the bedroom, the bathroom or beyond, I have a coupon readily available. Gmail’s promotions tab also makes these type of emails way less annoying.
A Bed, Bath and Beyond email came in on Tuesday. The subject line, “We’ve got one big Abbey family. Reminder, your 20% offer is waiting.” Again, with the 20% off. But, wait, what abbey? Downton Abbey?! I LOVE DOWNTON ABBEY! I’M CLICKING ON THIS EMAIL!
Sure enough, they have the full box set of DVDs for all the seasons of Downton. Ok. That’s kind of normal. I guess that falls in the –Beyond. Then I kept scrolling and saw sapphires, silver,…jewelry. From Bed, Bath and Beyond. Not just any jewelry, Downton Abbey themed jewelry. This is very strange and perplexing. Who knew that BB&B sold jewelry? But it’s pretty. And I LOVE SAPPHIRES. I’M CLICKING ON THIS, TOO!
Goddamit, Marketing 101 works on me.
The point of this post was not just to share my utter confusion with a store selling primarily housewares to be marketing 1900’s English jewelry, but also to share with you this beautiful (and cheap! helloooo $19.99) necklace from the Downton Abbey Bed, Bath and Beyond collection. It doesn’t make any sense. But that won’t stop me from buying it!
Seriously, how pretty is that??? I need it!